Staying Current with Intro Styles

Everyone's in a hurry. And: Everyone already knows all the

introductions that have ever been written online. If you're writing a blog, a how-to, an interview transcription, a research piece, an article --- be sure to get right to it. Skip the three or four paragraphs of cliches that used to be required openings. Your readers already know why they want to fix the toilet, learn how to outline a novel, who Einstein was, why you missed the signs that your ex was a narcissist, why love is better than hate, and why women should know how to change a tire. 

A one or two sentence intro is fine --- but no more than that. This isn't high school English, it's the web. Digitally oriented writers already know this. 

Say you want to know how to change 72 dpi to 300 dpi in Photoshop. Any good how-to article will simply start with "Go to Effects>Document Raster Effects Settings and either check high Quality 300 DPI or do a custom setting and use..." Hello and thank you. 

As opposed to an article, perhaps, on how to earn extra money if you've lost all your equity investing in companies promising to avert incoming meteorites from hitting earth. "So, you want to earn extra money. Perhaps you made a bad investment in anti-meteorite companies. Or maybe you were a victim of the housing bubble. Perhaps your ex got the settlement you were dreading. Now you need to earn more money. Perhaps you want to pay off your credit card debt. Or maybe you have a tax lien on your house..." 

You see what I mean? When you write copy, you will lose readers if you don't get right into the solution they are looking for. They already know they are broke / their dishwasher is leaking / their condo management has decided your dog is too big. They just want the answers. 

You help your readers by being direct, and you help yourself by keeping your readers!

Must use Oxford Comma

A job posting on Linked-In for a copywriter gave the requirements: must be a team player, handle stress, be familiar with Microsoft Office, etc, and must use the Oxford Comma. 

What a joy! 

What is an Oxford Comma? Remember when we were kids and the teacher said to put a comma after all list items except the item just before the "and"? That concept has bothered me for ... lo these many years. 

Here's an example of what the sixth grade teacher demanded:

Before locking up the office, be sure to turn off the lights, air cleaners and computers.

It groups air cleaners and computers together and gives that group the same importance as the lights by themselves. 

Imagine if you did that in your will: 

All the money goes to Child 1, Child 2 and Child 3. 

Oops. It looks like the money is divided in half, with Child 1 getting half, and Children 2 and 3 splitting the other half. 

The Oxford Comma puts an end to this practice and makes life more fair. You put your comma after each thing. 

All the money goes to Child 1, Child 2, and Child 3. 

Unless, of course, Child 1 was the favorite and you just didn't want to come right out and say it!

(c) 2017 Suzann Kale

Words I'm Not Using Anymore

So this is just the beginning/rough draft of this post, but I'm publishing it in hopes that I'll get feedback from readers.

Language - our inadvertent use of phrases we don't even think about - can shape our lives and our culture. For instance, Wayne Dyer said be careful about self-talk that begins with: "I am so sick of ..." or "Such and such makes me crazy..." or "I am always exhausted..." etc.

What about culturally accepted words and phrases that could also be harming us. Sayings that contain violence, sexism, or bigotry?

Here is the beginning of my list of things that we need to never use, ever again:


...killing 2 birds with 1 stone
...I'm so hungry I could eat a horse
...spiritual warrior

21st Century Writing

Don DeLillo's new novel ZERO K is a breathtaking masterpiece on how to write for the 21st century. See my review at:

http://suzannsblog.blogspot.com/2016/10/review-zero-k-novel_8.html

Semicolons - All You Need to Know

I found this article on The Writer's Circle. No more need we fear an impending semicolon.

Really?

Excellent article from The Writer's Circle:

http://writerscircle.com/very-and-other-useless-words-to-erase-forever/?utm_source=twc-twcfan&utm_medium=social-fb&utm_term=20160501&utm_content=link&utm_campaign=very-and-other-useless-words-to-erase-forever&origin=twc_twcfan_social_fb_link_very-and-other-useless-words-to-erase-forever_20160501












Photo by DMedina at morguefile.com

Follow that Car!

To never have another bad day in your life, avoid using the following words and phrases in your copy:

Never use the word location three times in a row. 

Never refer to an artist as, say, "the greatest living performer of his generation." You will instantly lose your credibility.

Remember that in copywriting, the words new and improved are translated by the listener to it still doesn't work and don't buy it if it's the last thing on the shelf. 

Never begin a sentence with the word well.

Whether you're writing a screenplay or scripting the last joke of the evening news, never refer to anyone as "doing the New York Times crossword puzzle in ink." 

Don't rhyme things.

Don't create a title for your article with a play on words using a current ad or movie title. For instance, a brain improvement article should not be called How to Be the Most Interesting Man on Earth.

Don't use an aphorism that everyone accepts because they've been hearing it since infancy, when in fact it actually has no relevance, and mostly no meaning. Examples:

Life goes on.

Be happy.

Suffering is good because we learn from it.

You've got to get out more.

What doesn't kill us makes us stronger.

Have a nice day.

Technology makes our lives too busy/crazy/hectic.

It's okay that he walks in his sleep - he's a creative type.

He minded his own business and just seemed so nice. 

(c)2016 Suzann Kale