Semicolons - All You Need to Know

I found this article on The Writer's Circle. No more need we fear an impending semicolon.

The New OCD - Obsessive Comma Disorder

There are two types of people in the world: those who use a discreet smattering of commas, and those who drown their copy in enough commas to cause the reader to asphyxiate.

Because this is the age of brevity, the comma rules we learned in school don't necessarily apply anymore. Stuff we learned in school tended to be long-winded and overly correct. Now, correctness is measured by how short you can make your document and still get your information across. In the world of commas, that translates to: only use a comma when you suspect your reader might go into respiratory failure.

OCD Style:

Assembling your new KittyzGymTM, is easy, as long as you have tools. Or, toolz, as we say here, at KittyzGym, the headquarters.

OCD Free:

Assembling your new KittyzGymTM  requires tools.

(A side-effect of deleting unneeded commas is that huge chunks of verbage simply vanish.) 


OCD Style:

Butter, the bain of Chef Eusebio's existence, and something we all like, right?, can be used in a healthy way, depending on, whether the butter is clarified, or ghee.

OCD Free:

Chef Eusebio prefers clarified butter, or ghee.

Eliminating commas when proofreading is a quick way to clarify the instruction booklet you've just written for your client's new home assembly circuit board kit. Yes, you want it readable because then people will say that your document is wonderful. It can go into your resume. But basically if it's readable, people will follow the directions and glue their fingers together less often. 

(c) 2015 Suzann Kale

We learned this is first grade.

Thank you all for coming I just want to let you know that I'm sorry I didn't show up it was Siri's fault she didn't remind me about my book signing.


Has no one heard of ending a sentence with a period and beginning the new sentence with a capital letter? 

How about: Thank you all for coming. I just want to let you know that I'm sorry I didn't show up. It was Siri's fault. She didn't remind me about my book signing.

The Universe Has Used Up Its Apostrophe Allowance

There is a wide-spread mythological belief system that says there should be an apostrophe anywhere you see the letter "s". It can go before, after, around, or anywhere near this s.

Although this myth is completely untrue, people keep writing things like this:

Family Practice Healthcare is opened Monday’s and Tuesday’s, and the dental care Wednesday’s and Thursday’s. They will no longer see patient's at the downtown buildings.

The tall ones' are for beer.

The phone numbers' for all the new barista's are behind the counter.

It's an apostrophe catastrophe.


Possessive
Use an apostrophe if something belongs to someone. Like: This is Ryan's personal wallet that he owns. (Note that owns does not have an apostrophe.)

Use an apostrophe if a group owns something. Like: The Men's Gardening Center. Or The children's lunchroom.

Just because something is plural does not entitle it to an apostrophe. The children's library cards. (Not The children's library card's.)

Apostrophes indicate ownership.


Contractions
Apostrophes also indicate that a word is contracted. You can say: It's happy hour in Newfoundland because It's is the contraction of It is. You cannot say: Its almost time for your surgery. (Should be: It's almost time.)

When you use an apostrophe to indicate a contraction, the apostrophe is put where the missing letter would be. Like M'am, which is short for Madame. Or let's which is short for let us.

Apostrophes indicate a missing letter.

(c) 2015 Suzann Kale

 

Just Saying

Dear Bank of xxxxxxxxx:

Thank you for your email alerting me to the weekend outage for Bill Pay. However, it's important, when sending information to your customers, to use correct grammar. 

You wrote: "During this time, Bill Pay will be unavailable however payments made Fridayevening and throughout the day Monday will be processed normally..." 

Who wrote this? Why didn't anyone proofread it before sending it out to your customers? 

After "...will be unavailable" there should be a period - and the word "however" should begin a new sentence, which means it should be capitalized. After "however" there should be a comma. It should read: "During this time, Bill Pay will be unavailable. However, payments made Friday evening and throughout the day Monday will be processed normally..."

This is basic grade school English. As a Bank of xxxxxxxx customer, I would hope that you guys know how to write basic sentences.

Sorry if I seem harsh. This is just worrisome.

Sincerely,

Tags: Businss Writing, Editing, Grammar, Proofreading, Punctuation

This is an actual instruction on a website that provides critical alerts and medical pagers. People's lives depend on these instructions being accurate and easy-to-follow:

If you are a (name of company) user you may still page by 7 digit pager number simply leave the area code blank you may also still page by name simply type name in pager field.

A sentence ends with a period and the next sentence starts with a capital letter. If you work for any company, anywhere, that provides any sort of services of any kind, be sure your documents are written coherently. 

(c)2014 Suzann Kale

Tags: sentence structure, grammar, punctuation, writing styles, business writing, technical writing, editing, proofreading

Make It Concise

Even if you're writing something as quick as a 2-sentence email, there's no need to be sloppy. Here's how to make your tiny blurbs earn their keep.

Before:
Team Members: Please see the attached document, post at all positions’, (Guidelines for values). 

After:

Team Members: New "Guidelines" document is attached. Please post.

Before: 

Please if anyone has any issues, questions, or concerns please ask me, if I cannot answer I will ask my mentors, and use resources’ to answer anyone’s questions.

I advise against asking your co -worker Please come directly to me, I have 4 or 5 different ways of being reached if not in the office.    This will eliminate any misunderstandings you may encounter.

After:

Let me know if you have any concerns.

Before:

My goal is to keep everyone working together.  ( I will be delegating each team member , a department responsibility).  Since we are a team this will unite our department.

Some members of our staff asked for a job specific responsibility, I agree it will promote a united front.     ("A house divided will fall"). 

After:

I will be giving each team member a specific responsibility.

(c)2014 Suzann Kale

Tags: business writing, technical writing, verbage, punctuation, grammar, syntax

Avoiding Random Apostrophes

So many apostrophes swinging in the wind, floating randomly at the end of things, unable to latch on to anything coherent.

Before you attach one of these random waifs to any part of your memo, email, announcement, or article, hold back. Pause. Think it through. Only attach it if it makes sense.

Before:

Team Members: The stock rooms  at both the Jackson and Whitehall campus’ will be closed on Monday.

After:

Team Members: The stock rooms at both the Jackson and Whitehall campuses will be closed on Monday.

To make something plural, you generally do not add an apostrophe. The plural of campus is campuses. If in doubt, Google it. 

(c)2014 Suzann Kale

Tags: punctuation, grammar, apostrophes, plural, business writing, technical writing

Inter-office Emails and the Run-On Sentence

It's a matter of being understood. We rush through our email compositions so fast that sometimes the results are incoherent. Here is an email I saw recently:

Team Members When providing transportation for clients the office to call is 555-7395 on weekends 555-2488 if no answer on Tuesdays 555-3850. Extension 322.

This could mean anything, and your team members will have no idea what they're supposed to do. Be clear in your mind what you are trying to say, and place punctuation accordingly. 

Team Members: When providing transportation for clients, call the main number at 555-7395. On weekends, call 555-2488. On Tuesdays, if there is no answer at the main number, call 555-3850, extension 322.

Just this little bit of thought will help the team members get to the right place.

Tags: grammar, punctuation, run-on sentences, commas, business emails

Commas - Grammar's Intuitive Fashion Star

I was co-authoring a piece with another writer. It turned out we had two different comma styles.

Neither one was right or wrong, they were just different.

Some parts of English grammar are untouchable. Commas are not. They are fluid. They change with the times. They are almost artistic in the way that we indulge them. It is less "where must this comma go?" than "where do I feel this comma?". 

When we baby boomers were in grade school, we were taught that in a list of three things, the comma was left off the third thing. So for instance:

If the bomb hits, children should run to the hallway, the bathroom or the closet.

Legalese followed this no-comma-on-the-third-thing rule.

As we grew older, we realized it didn't make sense. So we wrote:

If the bomb hits, children should run to the hallway, the bathroom, or the closet.

Now that felt better, and I know I felt more comfortable about the whole thing.

No one will call you on a wrong comma. Commas are artistic. You put them where you need them for breathing, for emphasis, or for logic. 

Which means - take care when placing your commas. Give it some thought. Make it make sense.

In the olden days (baby boomer time), people put commas all over the place, willy nilly. Now, in modern times, the comma style is generally more sparse. We take fewer breaths when we speak (or read), and we like things streamlined. 

What is your commas style?


(c) 2014 Suzann Kale

Tags: Commas, punctuation

Plural Possessive

Really, the signs should read: Ladies' Room. It's the room belonging to the ladies. No one pays attention to that, but it still bothers me. 

If the plural already has its own spelling, as in children, then the apostrophe goes like this: the children's room.

So we have:
the people's ice cream
the men's hairstylist

And don't forget the pronouns: It's their apartment. (The apartment belongs to June and Ward.)
                                                    The apartment is over there by 72nd Street.

Tags: punctuation, apostrophes, plural possessive

Natalie Goldberg on Punctuation

"A period was a heavy anchor for Philip, and he stopped and rested when he reached one. Punctuation had real significance. It signaled the beginning and end of thought.

'And if punctuation is about thought,' I thought, 'then in order to punctuate, we have to know our mind, to know what we think, and when one thought stops and the other begins. We have to understand the journey of thought, how thought moves around in our mind.'"

                          Natalie Goldberg, Wild Mind


Tags: Natalie Goldberg, Punctuation, Wild Mind

                                                                         

One Little Comma Can Change Everything

For example:

half a cup of chopped walnuts

vs

half a cup of walnuts, chopped


These two amounts will be very different. In the first example, you would chop up a bunch of walnuts and from that pile you would measure out half a cup. That's a lot of walnuts.

In the second example, you would measure out a half cup of whole walnuts. Then you'd dump them on the cutting board and chop them up. That's a smaller amount of walnuts.

Punctuation and syntax - something we often ignore when we're rushing to get out an email, blog entry, or memo - totally affect what you're trying to say. If we want our communications to be precise and easy to follow, we have to pay attention to these "small" details. Just this one little comma can make or break the recipe!

(c)2014 Suzann Kale

                                                                                                           

  Tags:  punctuation, commas, syntax

Is it Poetry, or PowerPoint?

Lately I've seen a lot of weirdly placed capital letters. In memos, emails, and on websites - there will be a capital letter in the middle of of sentence for no reason. Another variation is a return in the middle of a sentence with a capital letter starting the new line. And sometimes strange returns.

Here are some examples - and it's like this weird plague that seems to be spreading:


Team Members:
Please remember to place your Umbrellas in the hall, not in the office. Yesterday we had
Someone fall because the office floor was slippery.

I've been trying to figure out why this is happening. Are we inadvertently using PowerPoint or headline styles? And are we forgetting to proofread stuff before sending it out?

When proofing your memo, remember that nouns are generally not capitalized in the middle of sentences. And watch out for Word auto-correcting by adding capital letters willy nilly.


(c)2014 Suzann Kale

Tags: PowerPoint, headline, styles, auto-correct, capital letters, proofreading, writing

Pitfalls of Word's Defaults

Word likes to anticipate your faults and make you look illiterate. One of the ways it does this is to capitalize things indiscriminately. The result is often capitalized words in the middle of sentences, making it look like you never learned that a period ends a sentence and a capitalized letter begins a new sentence. 

1. Word will automatically capitalize the first letter of the next word after a period. But you may be putting in a period for reasons other than ending a sentence - like a dot-com situation, or an a.m./p.m notation. Be sure you proofread everything you send out, checking specifically for this. (Different versions of Word do this differently.)

2. Better yet, go into Word and click on "Review." Right-click on "Spelling and Grammar." Click on "Customize Quick Access Toolbar." Look in the left column, and left-click on "Proofing." Left-click on "Auto Correct Options." Uncheck "Capitalize first letter of sentences." Click "OK." Click "OK" again.

3. Now you have to remember to capitalize the first letter of each sentence. But we've been doing that since first grade; I don't think it will be a problem. And the good news is, Word will not be messing with the interior of your sentences.

(c)2014 Suzann Kale

Tags: Word, capitalization, spelling, grammar, proofreading, punctuation